My husband and I are blessed with 2 children, a boy and a girl.
Now I figured my parenting methods would suit both as they got older… how naive was I!
So much to take into account with their emotional and physical differences; love languages, thought processes, growth spurts, hormones!
You would think that with a degree in Early Years I would have more sense, but I forgot to apply that knowledge at home.
Researching How To…
There are numerous studies out there on how differently girls and boys think, learn, react, etc. Check it out on Google Scholar if you want to go in depth with the research (be warned, the studies can be heavy going, not for light reading before bed!)
So my parenting adapts constantly to take into account all of the physical and chemical changes that are happening to them.
F is 9 and rapidly approaching puberty (heaven help us!) and it’s showing in her outbursts. Sometimes she doesn’t understand why she feels angry, sad or frustrated, so HUGE amounts of patience are required to help her talk (and vent) through them.
Oh, and some nutella on bread with sliced banana on top… great for a vitamin B top up and calming the hormones!
E is 6 and has always had a bit of difficulty processing emotions. We have had periods of rages, tears and tantrums but ultimately he is very cuddly and a sponge for knowledge. He is a literal child and so we help him to understand what his feelings are and why he gets them. Being factual and logical with him works best.
Discipline and Understanding Consequences
So adapting parenting techniques is something that we are constantly learning. Discipline methods change; when time out on the stairs stopped working, we introduced the consequence cup.
In the cup are 20 consequences written on pieces of paper and folded up, ranging from banned electronics and earlier bedtimes to extra housework and even a ‘get out of jail free’ type choice.
At the moment it is working wonderfully and their behaviour has definitely improved!
Physical Interests and Needs
Another difference was their physical interests. F is MAJORLY into dancing, gymnastics and contortion whilst E is into trampolining, cycling and football. I struggle a lot with this because of my pain levels and mobility issues so I have to find ways for them to follow their interests without damaging myself further.
Fortunately, we have a big garden so up went a 14′ trampoline! Fab! Bouncing and gymnastics solved! Then my handy husband, J built a bar in the garden for F to balance on and somersault over… tick number 3.
We live in a close so there is a fair amount of room outside our house away from busy traffic. E’s best friend lives next door and also loves cycling, so we bought a ramp so that they could ride around safely and do stunts.
Both sorted and all I have to do is watch, cheer and video them!
Do you find that you have to adapt to constantly developing kids? Maybe you have some tips you could share! Please subscribe to my site and leave a comment!